Draw near

I haven't blogged in awhile and I guess it's because I don't really know what to blog about. I haven't had any insights into life, nothing dramatic happen. It's just been...life. Hmmm, life as I know it. Today I'm fasting. Right now I'm really hungry. This is the first time it's hit me all day, strange I thought I'd be hungrier this afternoon. Anyways, I was prayer walking on campus today and God opened my eyes a little more to Himself. As I looked around and watched all the students I realized how vast the population is and how small I am. How can I reach all these people? What am I really doing here? Can I really accomplish what God has for me? A lot of those thoughts have to do with the fact that I came back from break and none of my six promising students can meet with me any longer (2 no longer want to and 4 of them have "time constraints"). Thinking over that is rather dreadful. So, as I pondered that and looked out over campus I realized how much of it is all about God. Ok, how all of it is about Him. How so much of this year is all about Him working in me and somehow reaching the nations. I'm reminded of a quote from my dear friend Steven from earlier this year. I don't remember it exactly, but it went something like this, "Coming into this year I thought it was going to be about 80% of God using me to reach this campus and 20% of God working in me. But now I've realized that it's about 100% of God working in me and somehow through that, He's going to reach the campus."How true that is. It's all about drawing near to God. How He pulls us into His presence and then uses us when we least expect it. That's why it's an outpouring of His love for us. How can it be an outpouring if we're not being poured into? I guess I've been changing my priorities a lot lately. Making it more about Him and less about me doing things for Him. More about His love and less about how I can love others. I can do all things through Christ who strenthens me. Hmmm, so that means I need Christ's strength, which comes from Him (not myself). Yeah, that's it. It's all about Jesus. How often we get it wrong, how often we forego a relationship with God and get caught up in the performance. He made us for His enjoyment. He enjoys our presence. As a team we're reading "The Pursuit of God" by A.W. Tozer, in it he states that God is waiting for us, and waiting and waiting. Incredible that God is waiting for us to draw near to Him, to pursue Him. To reach out and grab onto His hand and just be in His presence. This is all random, and I guess I do have something to blog about. God is incredible and I'll never understand His ways, but maybe that's the beauty of it.